In an essay titled ‘The Lost Art of Conversation’, published in the June 24, 1989 issue of The Saturday Evening Post, author Vance Thompson wrote: ‘The very act of reading is unsocial. It is a kind of melancholy barbarism. If you look about you in a railway train, in a street car or bus, you will observe that everyone is reading —men, women, and even the innocent little children. Silent, glum, their eyes glued to book or paper, they sit there, like so many savages brooding in a jungle…

‘Conversation is in the way of becoming a lost art-like the making of mummies and the laying of the great auk’s egg. We have such a precious deal of reading to do that conversation is out of the question. We have no time to talk. Conversation is decaying. We are reading ourselves into a silent race.’

Pan to the 21^st century, and, ironically, experts are prompting parents to foster the art of reading among children, while urging them to monitor their use of smartphones.

There is a thin line that borders that transposition, as each condition hangs like the sword of Damocles over users. In a rather bizarre way, it reflects the human audacity to be on a constant marathon race to disconnect from the reality.

And that, again, is an ironic supposition. For, smartphones have been boosting human connections like never before. So the contention that instant messaging apps and social media have taken connectedness to another level is valid and there is no denying its reach. But what it does not validate is the need to be connected at all times of the day – even night.

Friends, relatives, colleagues, long-forgotten classmates, batch-mates, teachers and even strangers who meet online are connected, giving the ubiquitous smartphone the status of a magician; a god. One that can keep users informed, entertained and connected at all times.

So why should its use have any restrictions; limitations that appear like aberrations of a good life?

For the very reason that Vance Thompson’s essay on ‘The lost art of conversation’ concluded: people are busy reading – all the time, everywhere – forgetting the art of conversation. He defined the act of reading as unsocial, which sounds like an oxymoron when contrasted with the ‘social’ media apps of today. But the base line is that all the screen time has created a chasm in the verbal communication platform, which, not long ago, defined human conversation.

With recent data suggesting that globally people average over six hours of screen time (online and on screen) per day – around three hours, forty three minutes of that time on mobile phones – that chasm is likely to grow manifold, more so since daily screen time has increased by close to 50 minutes since 2013. Studies also show that the average person spends upwards of 40 percent of their time on internet connected screens. Not surprisingly, this growth has spread to little children too. Nearly 50 percent of children under the age of two are said to interact with smartphones, while older children are following the pied piper called smartphone with more ease.

Should it be a cause for worry, beyond the lament that the art of conversation is getting frayed?

Yes! Several studies have found a link between internet addiction and mental health problems like depression, anxiety and disrupted sleep among teens.

In an interview with The Arabian Stories, Shima Jenabi, Psychologist at Apollo Hospitals, Oman, affirmed that smartphones can lead to behvarioural problems among children. She pointed out that it can create stress and fatigue, cause sleep disorder, lead to distraction and academic retardation, and pose moral dangers as it offers easy access to unethical sites. “Children may also send and receive inappropriate messages, pictures and videos which gets imbibed and becomes a fundamental issue,” she cautioned.

Broaching on the link between smartphones and the art of conversation among children, she said, “Children’s speech becomes weak because they become isolated and their physical relationship decrease. And this is true for adults and senior members of the family as well.”

But can smartphones also have negative impact on listening/hearing skills?

According to Jenabi, “long term use of hands free and headphones, especially if they are used to listen to loud music, could cause hearing loss and other hearing problems.”

While there is no denying that people are increasingly finding it difficult to hold face-to-face conversations or engage in effective communications, she opines that smartphones have both negative and positive impacts. She lists them as follows:

Negative impact

• Instead of having a face-to-face conversation people prefer sending message, thus avoiding certain emotional connect.
• Instead of warm and sincere conversations during any family gathering, people are occupied with their phones, their heads down, engaged in a bigger virtual community
• Small family gatherings have disappeared
• Most people are content sending messages with emoticons and simple but sincere sentences than expressing love to their wife or kids in person.
• Family group games have given way to individual games on the phones.

Positive features

• With the smartphone our ability to be connected to our near and dear ones across the globe has been a blessing. Video calls have given us the opportunity to feel connected even though the distances are unbearable.
• In a blink of an eye you are capable of sending your desired content from one end to the other
• Breaking news is published in the shortest of time…

Jenabi suggests the following tips to balance the scale:

1. Personal mobiles phones should be restricted for children – keep phones away as it is not necessary for young kids who depend on parents to have a phone of their own
2. It is better to turn off or limit the internet when giving the phone to the child
3. Forbid the use of mobile phones or tablets before going to bed
4. Control the duration of mobile phones and tablet usage
5. Control the environment of mobile usage i.e., while eating, homework time, when there are guests at home, when you are at a party, in public spaces.

“Enjoy the physical world and give away virtual one,” is her advice.